Ever feel like you just don't belong? Like the feelings of dissimilarity go beneath the skin and latch onto something much more abysmal? Every now and then, I feel that way. Perhaps going to a sports orientated school wasn't the best decision for me; most of the student population are involved with sports, and overall, there is not much diversity (however, the school is working on building a more assorted student population). I really like the school, and it is fantastic for academics, but I don't necessarily feel as though I fit in as most of the girls and guys know each other through sports teams and what not.

Today, at a mandatory school event, I looked around at all of the girls in their short skirts, high heels and dresses and felt just as out of place as ever. It seemed like everyone else was carefree and having fun while I just couldn't relinquish my feelings of jealousy. I'm not even sure jealousy is the right word, but more like a general longing for something I'll never have. It probably didn't help matters much that I attempted to shop for some jeans yesterday and failed greatly.

I'll never have had the pleasure of getting to play sports throughout my younger years, and I'll never know what it's like to prance around campus in a short skirt without prominent stares from my fellow colleagues. I'll never know what it's like to live a day of life without the condition present.

I think I always have these feelings (to an extent) year round, but the seasonal transition into summer just exasperates them beyond belief (on certain days).

From my experience, the best thing you can do is allow yourself to feel the emotions. Don't try to deny their existence, for internalizing such thoughts can lead to depression and other mental disorders later on in life. I think the key is to feel the emotions, but not get stuck on them for so long that you cannot move beyond them. Allow yourself to acknowledge their presence and to feel them, then move on. Once you have felt your emotions, you can remind yourself of all your blessings and start to really appreciate them. However, in my experience, if you skip the step of genuinely dealing with the emotions, then you will have a hard time appreciating anything at all.

Thoughts? - A