Being immersed into the world of an adult is a strange feeling when you feel as though your teenage years barely even existed. Until the end of eighth grade, I was living relatively normal and then everything changed in a flash. I didn't know what I was in for, and sometimes I think that naivete was for the best as I was so young, I wasn't aware of the complexities that would be thrown my way.

My younger sister is in high school and I see her living the high school life in which I wanted, the one in which I thought I would have. Seeing her involved in activities, going out with friends constantly and having boyfriends makes me realize just how much I did miss out on. High school is the years in which you really begin to find your independence – and dare I say even revel in it, to a certain extent. In some ways I did find my independence, in other ways I was halted by my life circumstances. I learned to drive years after my friends did, but I did eventually learn. Sometimes, I feel as though I am just learning things that people my age have known how to do for years, and it frightens me. I feel threatened because at this point, I am expected to function as an adult, but there are so many days in which I do not feel ready, especially in a social context.

Every now and then, it feels as though I have been whisked onto an arena stage without any say. It's as though beaming lights come on and there are throngs of people so ready to see me do something, a performance of some sort. Only thing is, I have no clue what I am doing up there and have no prior performance skills; I didn't ask for this, nor was I ready for this. So I just stand there, mute, and the crowd watches with curiosity to see if I will do something, anything.